Being courageous

With only two months (and a bit) of the year left, I find myself looking forward to next year while also looking back over 2019.

My word for 2019 has been GROW. In some ways I feel that I’ve fallen short with my intentions. I don’t know about you, but for me I can look at all I still want to do and forget about all I already have done. Last week I was looking back at my seven years of calendar making and remembering how far I’ve come in that time. In some ways I’d almost forgotten.

Autumn Leaves in my Watercolor Sketchbook

When I think about what I’ve accomplished this past year, I realize that in many ways I have grown and am continuing to grow (there are two months left after all). It’s a little early to start doing a review of the year, but it’s good for me to remember I’ve accomplished a lot. Taking a look at areas where I feel I’ve fallen short can be helpful, too, as I plan for the coming months and the next year.

Maybe you’re thinking about these things, too? Maybe you have some big scary dreams you’ve been wanting to tackle, but that keep slipping away. Don’t give up on them.

Earlier this month I signed up for Kerstin Martin’s Asking for Impossible Things community project. She’s been sending out emails throughout October with essays by different entrepreneurs who have asked for impossible things. Although I don’t have my own specific impossible thing I want to ask, these stories have been inspiring to me as I think about what projects I want to tackle. So often the secret to success is simply asking for what you want.

Yes, it takes courage to ask for what you want. Or to pick up a paintbrush. Or to try something new. I think about what I’ve heard Bonnie Christine say in her classes: it only takes 10 seconds of courage.

This week I did something a little out of my comfort zone. I published my first YouTube video. Yes, I’d posted videos on YouTube before, but not with the intention of being present in that space.

For a while I’d been toying with the idea of posting YouTube videos. Sharing what I’ve learned there as well as here and on Skillshare. I’ve gotten lots of requests to do it. But it seemed scary. (Yes, I feel silly having written that). I’m doing it anyway.

Right now I’m planning out future videos and hope to share the first set weekly. I’ll be talking about my favorite art supplies and sharing tips and encouragement. I hope you’ll follow along. And if you have questions or specific things you’d like me to talk about, just let me know!

I don’t consider myself an especially courageous person. I live a fairly quiet life. I grow flowers. I play with paint. I make things. I write. When I look back at my life before I started painting, it looks a lot different than it does today. When I imagine living my life without art, it makes me sad (and mad).

Mexican Hat Flowers in Watercolor by Anne Butera of My Giant Strawberry

I know I’m not the only person who grew up believing I wasn’t artistic and yet yearned to be. I feel fierce when I think about it. And yes, courageous. It takes courage to keep painting when your first (and second and third and fourth… ) attempts fall so short of what you imagine. Perhaps it doesn’t feel that way when you’re in the thick of it, but it does. And remembering that helps me to be courageous as I try new things.

I don’t know what your dreams are — whether you’re feeling capable (or fearful) of trying something new, doing something different — but I hope you wont discount them. I hope you’ll keep going, wherever you might be on your journey. Remember how far you’ve already come as you plan your next steps. I truly believe what I said in my video: If I can do it, you can do it!